Thursday, February 19, 2009

Imaginary friends

I miss Sara, Bibbip, and George. Really.
They were my daughter’s imaginary playmates until she was four years old. She would play for hours creating imaginary scenarios; then spend lunch time telling me all about her adventures. Mostly they were about the relationships between her imaginary friends. One strange day Bibbip ate Sara and George.
At two years old, I’ve been told, children don’t really play with each other. It’s true. But yet, she would play with these invisible friends until they had to go home—which was always on her terms. I had no control of these friends. These friends were four and five—which must have been magic ages for my two-year-old.
As she grew older (around four), Alexis from Texas replaced Sara, Bibbip, and George. Instead of playing with Alexis, my daughter would become Alexis. She would say, “Mom, I’m going to the airport to pick up Alexis now,” as she left the room.
Shortly afterwards, she would return, saying, “Hello, K---’s Mom, I’m Alexis.”
When I asked her where K--- was, Alexis would say, “She’s visiting my family in Texas.”
“How did you get here from the airport?” I would ask.
“I drove K---’s car,” she would explain, as if it were obvious. Because every four-year-old has a car.
Sometimes I enjoyed having Alexis around. First of all, she ate chili for dinner, which my daughter refuses to do. Secondly, she acted like a guest: she had excellent manners, cleaned up after herself and never had a tantrum when I washed her hair. There was a time when Alexis stayed for close to a week. I didn’t want her to leave.
My daughter always remembered when she was pretending to be someone else and she would let me know, “K---’s Mom, I’m Alexis, not K---.”
Of course I should have known this by the behavior modification.

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